Summer time, livin easy...i think

I'll tell you whats strange (aside from this inescapable fact that my blog only gets posted to once a month at best, ach). Its strange how some days are friendly, welcoming, while some days are out to get you. Some days you wake up feeling grumpy and antsy and irritated from the getgo, and some days you wake up fresh and new. And once a bad day starts, it sort of feeds itself. Why? Is this because i BELIEVE (after the 4th thing gone wrong, say) that its a bad day, so then it attracts all the bad crap that supposed to happen for the week? And i'll tell you this: pretending that its NOT a bad day doesn't help. That only usually makes me end up crying because i'm so wrong and disappointed.

But then there are good days, and sweet moments. How do we have these vastly different experiences, in a moment, in a day, in a week? Sometimes i think its all controlled by what goes on in my dreaming life. I mean, i spend a third of my life (if i'm sleeping well) asleep - so maybe all that time dreaming and sleeping is actually where everything happens. I say this in part because i don't understand waking life, or dreams, but partly because sometimes i'll wake up with the taste of a dream, and it flavors my day. Like last night: i had a dream that i was being hunted down. Even if i didn't remember it, it sort of gives me the willies to know that i was experiencing some reality of fear and escape. And i carry that with me into my day. Maybe that's why i had a good day today? I was so glad to not be being chased.

I don't really understand how we can be so complex and varied in our experiences of life, time and space. Its even difficult to describe why i don't understand it. This is a strange world we live in. I've got to go prepare myself for another entrance into my Other Life. I am increasingly prone to believe in parallel realities, as a result of noticing these oddities.