Rachmaninoff movements move me

There's nothing like the symphony, to make me in love with life again. All of these people, on a stage, playing their hearts out, playing like it's their last day on earth. It makes me feel grateful. Even when i don't understand the music, there's something going on that's fascinating: strange and beautiful instruments (tubular bells? and putting a cymbal on the tympani, to then play the cymbal!). There is a gong, and three sets of xylophones, metal and wooden, plus horns and strings and woodwinds. Its...glorious.

I like the bassoon best, i think, as a long, slow, sweet lingering note comes out of them, and i feel at peace, comforted somehow. But then the strings! The strings start up, and they are furious, and in their fury they still manage to bring out melodies and music! And watching all the bows twitch and skither, oh, i love them too! But what about the horns? This tuba has a massive cork (er, well a muffler, if you like) that is so extraordinary! They are so regal, the horns, and so diverse in sound. But i do always come back to the bassoons. I think they all work, together, and i do love the pieces with some bassoon highlights.

This piece by Rachmaninoff, Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini, op 43, though - this piece features a piano. The pianist is amazing. She's married to the conductor, we discover from the ever-helpful programme. She sits at the piano bench, piano and bench chosen specifically for her. She lays her hands on the keys, and fingers move so quickly you can't keep track, can't see, but she IS producing that lovely music that leads or carries the piece along. She pounds keys, the keys jump out at her, and artist and instrument meld into magnificence. Sometimes she tinks lightly at the keys, other times she seems to throw herself to the hammers in the piano. At the end of it all, she stands up, exuberant, and to our thundering applause falls into full embrace with her husband. I can't wipe the screwball grin off my face.

Every time i go to the symphony, i am stunned. I just cannot wrap my mind around composers, conductors, or how any of this works. These people on stage are playing their instrument, their role, and somehow, it all comes together into this...soundscape. I just can't grip what a composer must do. I think its one of the arts that is quite particular: either you KNOW you are a composer, or you aren't. Its not like playing the violin (you can learn, and probably, if you work at it and aren't that gifted naturally, can get quite good) - you can't just "get good" at it. You must organize things in a way that you hear music, you hear things and thats how you express yourself. I am just eternally grateful that there are and have been people that do this, and produce pieces that evoke emotion, that create a story without words, that create a type of consciousness.

Its good to be alive. The St Louis Symphony goes on my list of favorites, too now.

Update of favorite things

Its time to stop being so hard on this place. Here's a starter list of my favorite things, so far:

• Home Eco - green general store! Eat your heart out, Boulder! wow.
• Terrene - ecotarian restaurant. yummy. good for you. nice people.
• Riddles - source local ingredients, longtime community restaurant
• Black Bear Bakery - worker owned local bakery - $1 day olds!
• Missouri Botanical Gardens - yep, its cool (also Earthways House Conservation Center)
• City Museum - haven't been yet, chomping at the bit to go
• Scott Joplin House - state historical site and site of a tribute to spoken word in St Louis last weekend
• Shangri-La - you've already read about this one. good VEGGIE food!
• Farmers Markets
• Schlafly Brewery
• Left Bank Books

The list is growing, i am happy to say. And, as spring arrives, so does more local produce and farm goods. See? Its not all gloom and doom!